I Don't Feel 51

Today is my birthday.  I've always been big on birthdays.  It's my day.  Just for me.  Celebrating me.  What's not to love about that?  With a nod to Mom, of course, because she brought me into the world.  And a tip of the hat for Dad because without him, I wouldn't be here.  (Mom didn't want any more kids after the first four, but Dad did.  Then there I was.  Tada!)  

So, today, I'm 51.  Not sure how that happened.  I mean, I know how it happened... like duh... but I never expected it to happen.  I sure don't feel 51.  Although I'm not exactly sure how 51 is supposed to feel.  Like I said, I never expected to get here, so I didn't envision how I'd be at this age.  

I think my brain thinks I'm still 23.  (Okay, sometimes I act like I'm twelve.  So do me somethin'.)  

A while back I was chatting with a little girl and later it occurred to me that I was old enough to be her grandmother.  That was a shocking thought, believe me.  Seriously, though, my daughter is 27.  If she'd had a kid at the age of twenty, that kid would be 7 now... the age of the little girl I was talking to.  Yeah, yeah, it's all pretty obvious, but still shocking to me.

Last year's birthday kind of sucked.  Stupid Kung Flu.  I'd like this year's to be better.  I plan on making it better.  Maybe just having a better attitude will make for a better day, since I don't really have any plans to do anything special today.  I might do something special for dinner and/or dessert.  We'll see.  

The little girl who lives in my head just said "I want a puppy for my birthday."  I had to tell her that we can't have a puppy.  "But I have enough money for a puppy," she replied, pointing to the checks I need to take to the bank later.  To which I said, "We are not getting a puppy."  Now, I think she's sulking.  Maybe I'll buy her a pretty prezzie later.  But not a puppy.

Like I said, I don't feel 51.