Wednesday, December 18, 2013

Screwed up Carols

My Dad sometimes liked to screw up Christmas carols.  I wish I could remember all the ways he made them funny, but right now I can only remember his version of Deck the Halls...

Deck the halls
With Boston Charlie
Fa la ra la rah, de sis boom bah.

Early in my childhood, I learned a new way to sing Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer...

Randolph the bow-legged cowboy
Had a very shiny gun
And if you ever saw it
You would turn, scream and run
All of the other cowboys
Used to laugh and call him names
They never let poor Randolph
Join in any cowboy games
Then one foggy Christmas Eve
The sheriff came to say
"Randolph with your gun so bright
Won't you shoot my wife tonight?"

I don't remember how that one ends.

Then there was the version of Jingle Bells...

Jingle bells.  
Batman smells.
Robin laid an egg.
Batmobile lost a wheel
And the Joker got away.

Of course, later in life, I was treated to such wonders as The Twelve Pains of Christmas and Cheech and Chong and You Ain't Gettin' Diddly Squat and the newest awesomeness of Jeff Dunham's Jingle Bombs.  So, is it any wonder I've been walking around the house singing...

Later on we'll perspire as we drink by the fire...?

Yeah, I'm screwy that way.  Any messed up carols in your life?


  1. This made me laugh. Out loud. I wish I had some screwy carols to add. Sadly, my family was pretty straightlaced. :(

    1. You can share mine, Silver. (The carols. I don't know if you'd want to share my family. We aren't even close to straightlaced. Straight-jacketed, maybe.)

  2. You know, for many (many) years, I thought it was: Later on we'll perspire... Glad I wasn't the ONLY one! :)

    1. LOL. Stacy. The song does kind of lend itself to that. ;o)

  3. Ha :) Love it, B.E.!! I, too, laughed out loud. And, like Silver, my family was pretty 'by the book' so I have nothing to add!! But thanks for sharing these!!

    1. Like I told Silver, you're welcome to share my carols, Janet. I'm glad you enjoyed them. =o)

  4. I can't listen to Christmas carols without feeling stabby. But I do like these ones! They're funny!