Oh, To Be Young and Naïve Again

As I was reading the industry blogs this morning, I came across an interesting comment here.  The gentleman starts out commenting on the post itself, and then at the end, he asks some questions that have me shaking my head.

He starts out saying he's a newbie to this.  Well, of course.  He's got the first draft done of his novel and he's at about 51K words, working on his second edit.  Short, but not an issue if he's adding as he edits.  Then comes the first corker.  He wants to be published by the end of the year.  And he wants to know what's the first thing to do - finish the book or start shooting queries all over the place. 

Oh to be young and naïve again.  I remember that wonderful first year of writing, when I was sure I had the manuscript that would rocket me into publishing stardom.  I was sure I'd be published by the middle of 2005. 

This young man (I assume young because he seems so untouched by the reality of this business) wants to know what he should do first.  I think the first thing he should so is take a long hard look at this industry and revise his timeline.  Then he needs to think about how long it's going to take to revise and polish, to create submission materials and polish those, to send out x-number of queries and wait for replies.  He needs to think in terms of how long - once he snags an agent - it will take for that agent to get his novel in front of publishers, and how long the process is from that point forward.  

Even if all the upfront stuff cranks through quickly, he'll be lucky if his book hits the shelves sometime next year.  But hitting all the ducks in the shooting gallery, without honing your shooting skills, is pure luck.  Like scratching a lottery ticket...  or as the baby in the below video says: "You realize the odds of winning are the same as being mauled by a polar bear and a regular bear in the same day."

(I had to delete the actual video, but you can see the e-Trade commercial I'm talking about here.)

Not that this person couldn't win the lottery, but if he does, I'll be showing a shocked face of my own.

Well Whaddya Know

It really did fall off.  Much like the poor gentleman to the left, but for different reasons.  He froze his off, I wrote mine off.  *All images deleted to avoid any chance of copyright infringement*

Technically WYAOW isn't over until tomorrow night, but I think I'm calling it quits.  Since yesterday morning, I typed over 10K words. My hands aren't quite demonic claws, but I'm having a tough time getting my fingers to hit all the right keys (and only the right keys).

Come to think of it, maybe they should call this event Write Your Hands Off Weekend.  Or Write Your Ass Flat Weekend would work, too, I guess. ;o)

Anyway, Now I must slather my arms in Aspercreme, lament the Colts loss, and call it a day.  How was your weekend?

WYAOW

WYAOW - or  Write Your Ass Off Weekend* - officially started yesterday.  I wasn't planning on playing along, but then, this morning, I decided 'what the hell'.  I'm not signing up for it or anything - mainly because I don't want to pick a day and because well... I'm not a joiner.  Instead I'll be approaching this like I did with NaNoWriMo.only on a smaller scale.  I'll just write as much as I can over this weekend and see what happens.

Should be productive.  We'll see what kind of demonic claws my hands turn into by Monday morning. 

Anyone else interested in writing her ass off**?

*Not to be confused with Write Your Ass Off Day - which was last May (according to someone from the NY Writers Coalition).

**Oh, that it were actually so.  Write and the gluteous pounds melt away.  :sigh:

Weekly Update

Welcome to another Friday at The Writing Spectacle.

This past week was pretty good for me.  I hammered out over 10K words - thanks to Sunday's mammoth effort - and the story is really coming together under this new POV.  All the things I loved about DLN are shiny and new and even better.  Those things I wasn't crazy about with this book are closer to getting fixed.  Also, my word count this week put me over the 50% finished mark.  Yay! 

To date, I've lost five pounds out of my thirty pound goal.  Hopefully by the end of the summer, I'll be down in the 140s again.  I'm not making great strides, like The Biggest Loser contestants, but that's about a pound a week, so I'm not crying over it.  I am using the concepts they teach on TBL - decrease calories, increase activity - but I'm not killing myself.  In my case, I'm happy with 'slow and steady wins the race'.

Speaking of Biggest Loser, my favorite contestant won immunity this past week.  Go Michael!  Something about that big Italian makes me want him to win.  And is it just me, or did Miggy undergo a transformation after her negative-Nelly daughter left the campus?  Miggy was a scary bitch before, and this past week, she seemed more positive and relaxed.  Hell, she even lost weight and she didn't even exercise (because of her appendix surgery).  I've said it before and I'll say it again - sometimes it's better to just cut toxic people out of your life.  Ya know?

In other news, I've been reading again after a six week hiatus.  I thought there might be some good stuff in my TBR pile, but WOW, I never thought this good.  Right now I'm in the middle of Rachel Vincent's My Soul to Save and it's pretty darn good, too. 

Okay, now it's your turn.  Anything going on in your life you'd like to share?  I'd love to hear some positive news from the readers.   And if you're a fan of Biggest Loser, who are you rooting for this season?

Fogie Time

We're all friends here, so let me ask you something.  When did I become tragically unhip?  When did I leave 'Hammer Time' and crash land in 'Fogie Time'?  As forty slowly--agonizingly--approaches, I'm wondering when I started looking at the kids of today and having my mother pop out of my mouth. 

"Cut your hair... Your bangs are too long." "Turn it down."  "Slow down."  "What the hell are you wearing?" (ETA: For the record, my mother never swears. That was Dad.)

Now, don't get me wrong.  I'm not talking about my own kid.  Other than 'turn it down' and occasionally 'what the hell are you wearing?', she's a pretty straight forward kid.  (And I try to reign in my oldness with her.  I do remember what being young was like.  Although... come to think of it, I never was a fan of loudness.  Maybe all those years in band, sitting in front of the coronets and the drum section, stunted the loud part of my brain.)

What brings this up?  Well, I was watching VH1's JumpStart this morning - checking out the music scene, donchaknow, and I saw this totally goth kid kicking out what I thought was a good song.  Sure, he looked like The Cure on a good day, but maybe that's the new thing (or the new old thing, as the case may be).  A big plus for him was that the song had an 80's vibe.  Looks 80s, sounds 80s - that's my kind of kid.

Anyway, I went to look him up on Amazon just now - to see if he was worth shelling out the moolah for his CD.  :shrug:  I wasn't nearly as impressed with the rest of his music.  I love 80s music, but come on, kid, take the old and make it new instead of just parroting what the 80s alternative/punk bands did.  Bleh.  And what's with the look?  Baby, the Cure was popular when you were still trying to chew your way out of the playpen.

Heh, reading back over what I wrote up there... I guess in this year of 2010, admitting I liked the kid because he was 80s, but disliked him because he was too 80s, does punch my ticket to fogie land.  (Almost as much as admitting I still like Frank Sinatra, I guess.)

I guess this is just a rambling post.  Ignore me.  You know what they say about getting older... There are three things that go first.  One is your mind and the other two... I don't remember.  ;o)

"You can't touch this... Stop. Fogie time" (You really don't want to see me dance like MC Hammer.)

Oh, and the kid?  Adam Lambert.  I swear when I saw this CD in the store, I thought the face on the cover was a girl.  Nope.  It's him.  :shudder:  I never thought I'd like even one song.  But I do.  Is that tragically unhip or is he the latest thing in music?

And I don't know about you, but I think this is the anthem of people trapped in the 80s like me...



It's '1985' by Bowling for Soup.  I couldn't find the actual video - which is hilarious, btw - but this'll do.

"When did Motley Crue become classic rock?"
"Who's that other guy in Van Halen?"
"When did Ozzy become an actor?"

When did I reach Fogie Time? 

Thoughts on E-books

There's been a lot of hullaballoo over the whole Amazon/MacMillan thing, and I'm not going to repeat the madness here.  However, I did think it was time for me to address the whole e-book craze and render my thoughts on the subject.

E-books are probably wonderful, but I don't read them. 

I'm not against them for other people.  To each their own, ya know?  But right now, I don't see the value e-books would bring to my life.  I'm an old school book lover.  I really love the whole visceral experience of reading - even when my wrists get tired holding a book.  (Hey, if the book's good enough, I'll read right through hand cramps like you've never felt.  It's a price I'm willing to pay for my paper copy books.)

A really good friend of mine got a Sony E-reader for Christmas.  She thought she'd hate it, but she fell in love almost immediately.  For her, the advantage is she can take it anywhere and read whenever she's got a few minutes.  This is especially necessary since she works long hours and has two active kids at home.  She doesn't have time to curl up on the couch with a hard copy book.  And I'm ecstatic for her because she's lamented not reading and now she can read to her heart's content.

For me?  Well, right now, I don't have any kind of e-reading device and I'm not shelling out money for one.  This means that if I want to read an e-book, I have to do it from this spot.  When I read here, it's for work.  I read my own books and my friend's books here.  This is my spot for critting and editing and creating.  It's not my spot for wallowing in the pleasure of a good novel. 

"Oh, but the e-readers are perfect for couch reading or bed reading," you say.  I'm sure you're right, but aside from the loss of everything else I love about a hardcopy book, I'm just not feeling like reading from a little gadget is going to blow my skirt up.  (And of course, there's the cost, which I already mentioned.) 

I know this opinion is keeping me from reading some really awesome e-book only novels.  I can think of one title right now that I really want to read, but since it's not on paper, I'm going to have to suffer.  I know I'm probably missing out in some ways, but this is where I'm at in my life, and I'm not seeing a change in the foreseeable future.  Call me an old fogie, or a stick in the mud, or a hick.  :shrug:  I gotta be who I am, ya know?

So, what are your thoughts on the e-book revolution?  Would you, like my friend, read more if you had an e-reader, or are you fine with books they way they've always been?

And Now a Word From...

Aspercreme!  The handy-dandy lotion no writer should ever be without.  It slices, it dices, it... Wait...  Would you believe 'it squooshes, it oozes'?  Well, no matter what it does, it makes my hands stop hurting.  

If you look over to the right, you'll see a strange number under the word meter for yesterday.  No your eyes aren't playing tricks.  I really did type over 5K words yesterday. And I'm paying for it today...

I'd celebrate the awesome word count, but instead I'm going to be hanging out with my best friend, Aspercreme.  Pick some up today.*

(*This writer receives no compensation from the makers of Aspercreme - other than the relief it provides so I can continue to write.  Also, this writer provides no guarantees.  If it works for you, great.  If not, blame them, not me.)